My Kinda Girl

The first time I heard a girl sing in a punk rock band I got a raging boner. My boyfriend at the time handed me his head phones and said "You're gonna like this". It was "Oh bondage, up yours" by The X-Ray Spex. Polly Styrene screeched and screamed! She hit notes that made me want to kick trash cans and get in fights with dudes! I was 16 and I KNEW I wanted to be like her music made me feel. Empowered, strong...The Runaways sang "I want to be where the boys are". I wanted to be where the girls were! Where were my kick ass woman?
Being 17 is pretty lame. The boys just want to fuck you and most girls transitioning are to0 insecure to ask what they want or need form ANYONE! I felt alone growing up. My punk rock boy friends would make fun of bands like "Bikini Kill" or "L7". The only riot gurls I knew where the fucked up drug addicts, not really in to doing much else. I gave up and went Goth. I listened to Bauhaus and cursed this ridiculous world I obviously wasn't EVER going to be a part of.
Being a girl, a young girl, a woman and elderly woman is fucking brutal. I have been called a stupid slut when dressed provocatively. This was not to entice men, I really didn't give a fuck about getting extra dick. I had a boyfriend. This was for me! Every attempt I made to express myself was shot down. Whore, Slut, Stupid, Tease, Attention Whore...This made me recoil even more in to the shell built by self hating, insecure boys and girls.
Today as a 30 year old woman I still strive to be assertive and honest with what I want and need. A 15 year battle, a battle I'm winning. I can't lie, when I meet a woman with integrity, intelligence and will kick your fucking ass and fuck whom she wants my heart lights up! It's hard but there are some amazing woman out there, and I will totally fuck you!

Xoxo
Desiree