My X is a feminist

I feel like a new man


I write to you all on the occasion of my Vasectomy. (actually it was
yesterday morning).
A vasectomy is a very simple surgery in which the scrotum is opened
with a small incision and the vas deferens connecting each of the
testicles to the rest of the plumbin' are severed and cauterized.
Vasectomies is close to 100% effective form of birth control. I am
fixed.
The vasectomy does not affect my hormonal cycle; it does not affect
my sexual function. My testes continue to produce sperm, they just
don't GO anywhere now.
Vasectomies are reversible at some expense (the high end is $50,000
but you can get them done at schools, kind of like dentistry on the
cheap) but i can't imagine needing to have kids anytime soon. In fact, i
expect to be quite busy raising other peoples' kids.
My vasectomy will not cause me to gain weight, have a disrupted
hormonal cycle, have insane periods, lose my mind, tear my uterus or
accidentally sterilize me, side effects not unknown to every form of birth
control available to women. if you are a man that 'does it' with women
and you are as craven and cynical as i am, please consider a
vasectomy. You will be doing us all a favor.
The state of Washington paid for my vasectomy. the "Take chArge"
program through the WA. state DSHS provides public funding for vasectomies.
Interestingly enough, if you are a woman and you want to get fixed,
they make you go to a psychologist (whether or not they allow you to
get the surgery) and they cost much more. Also interesting, a hep C test
costs 90$ in WA. but a vasectomy is free... Member-ship has its
privileges...
The operation was very fast and relatively painless. the nerdy
middle aged lady doctor shot my scrotum up with lidocaine (the syringe was
the size of a carrot and was pretty intimidating) and after that i
hardly felt anything. I saw little wisps of smoke rise up as she
cauterized the sperm-tubes. Medipak makes a cauterizing pen specifically for
vasectomies.
After the operation i read some shitty comics and wished i could run
around. The hole they make in your scrotum remains open and is the but
that tAKES the most healing. My balls ache vaguely but other than that
i'm in no pain.
I am to wait two months AND 15 ejaculations (both, not either or)
before i am to be sure i am firing blanks so if anyone needs to get prego
by me ('it's in there!') make sure you do so by september.
Okay! June 10th and it's 40 degrees and pouring rain! I love
washington!
I'll see everyone between the 16th and the 29th of july; i expect to
be in the gay area 16th-19th and SD following that.

-K

I suggest all you men who aren't planning to have children follow in Kev's foot steps .

The worst thing to find under your pillow

Strange guys house, room and bed. "you look tired"."You can crash in my room for a while". Ah, excellent idea. I have been driving around LA all day...sounds good. I climb in to the inviting comfortable looking bed. I sleep for about 20 minutes. Hmmm, What's this? It's hard and cold. It's under my pillow. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!
I don't move for a good 5 minutes, staring with one hand covering my mouth. I delicately move it to the desk...I decide I can not go back to sleep while staring at it. I open a drawer to hide it neatly away. Inside the drawer is a mound of $20 bills. Interesting. I decided to call Garth because I was alone in Culver City in a house, in the ghetto, with a man I know nothing of. PANIC
Later that evening he made me potato tacos with homemade salsa. He made me up a bed in the living room. Before I called it an evening I hinted that I found his special friend and moved it to a drawer. He nodded and that was it. Karina got in around three am and we were suppose to leave at 4 am to get to la in time for our makeup gig...We ended up sleeping through it. It wasn't a paid job but I would have liked to make dead people.We did end up going to our first job on Wednesday after driving around for an hour looking for the place. I don't think I want to go back there anytime soon.