Wow

I went through and read all of my e-mails sent and recieved the last week. Nuts...Last two months of blog posts, also nuts.

I think its safe to say I have been out of my mind. Nervous breakdown? Or one in the works. The string of events leading up to it when looking back this year were all good reason for this reaction.

I felt like I have been floating through life, feeling suffocated and never really making the attempt to escape. I finally did ready or not and I ate shit. I wasn't prepared. I just didn't know how to handle it.

I wasted so much time and Im really sad that I let things go as far as they did. I let myself die. I gave up on everything.

I will never let myself feel like that again. I want to start over. I have a great oppertunity to do that right now. I just want to complete school. Thats all Im going to worry about right now.